Sunday, December 11, 2011

A Nightmare November

Warning: Self Pity Content!

So glad it's December, hopefully things can get better! In my last post I mentioned my knee injury that was on the mend and that I was hoping to get my activity level back up to normal if the "cold I was nursing" went away. D'oh, spoke far too soon.

Whatever monster lurgy I developed had me effectively sofa bound and off work for a whole week (only cos choice of mindless telly was better than what I can watch in bed), then another week slowly becoming more human, working from home...In the end it was 12 complete days of doing absolutely nothing.

I managed to get my act together and get up to my folks in the middle of the month, mainly to visit my Nana. She was diagnosed with MND earlier this year and was deteriorating fairly steadily. I knew she had major problems moving, holding her head up and couldn't talk but she could still write, albeit slowly. So we had a conversation of sorts, the hardest thing to deal with for me was actually her complete lack of facial expression, there are so many nuances in a person's face normally.

She had refused the electronic voice thingy as she didn't want to sound like Stephen Hawking! Stubborn old bird. I left worrying what on earth was going to happen once she lost the ability to write, as mentally she was still as sharp as a tack, just stuck inside her own head with no other way to communicate.

8 days later she died in her sleep(as often happens with MND). It was quite a shock but also a relief at the same time. It was no sort of a life and I'm convinced she took the only control option left to her in the end by refusing to eat I said stubborn. As you can imagine I was pretty pleased I'd managed to get to see her.

On the way home after the funeral (Wednesday 23rd), I stopped off at Glentress for a bit of a ride. My fitness had long since gone over a cliff due to knee injury followed by lurgy and my original plan was to just pootle round the red, just pedalling, thinking things over, enjoying the endorphins.

I ended up doing the black climb (why, I have no idea, haven't done it for years and I really wasn't really well enough) up to the mast then the red descent. The climb was a complete grovel at times, particularly as I kept trying to attack it in too high a gear but I enjoyed the pain in that weird way, I think I needed the effort. I need to ride this climb more often when I end up at GT, its fantastic.

I picked up the red descent from Spooky Wood and had an absolute whale of a time all the way back to Hub. It was due to shut on the Sunday so I was quite pleased to be able to buy one last piece of carrot cake.

Since then I've been trying to claw my way back to fitness. It's not going entirely smoothly, not helped by the stupidly windy weather and my desire to keep things short at this time of year. I've gotten a few "easy" short runs in, quite a few swims and am starting to get back out on the bike. I even set my turbo up again....not actually ridden on it yet but now the threat is there I'm actually going to cycle to work tomorrow, 30 mph gusts or not (I'm sure I'll be swearing like a trooper once battling it).

Onwards and upwards!


  1. what a tough novemeber you've had. mnd is such a destructive condition, for everyone. i'm so glad that you had the opportunity to visit your nan.

    good luck for your commute tomorrow!!

  2. Its horrible being ill, feeling your fitness gently seep away.

    So sorry about your Nana Julbags! Perhaps for the best though. Sending hugs.